happy new year <3

what a break. i did pretty much nothing (apparently some people have been studying like crazy for term two, how can that be?!) but it was good. =) dont' want to go back to school... waah.

some new years resolutions, even though resolutions were created just for breaking...

[+] this year, i'm going to learn to stand up for myself. tired of being pushed around by my parents and by people who think they can just freeload all their problems for me to solve or do.

[+] have the uhill girls win at least one table tennis game against a school. individually, win against all three opponents.

[+] get my "N!"

[+] need to try to stop being so cranky. term 1 was ridiculous, i was touchy all the time because of all the stress and i'd lash out at people when i didn't mean to.

[+] make the tennis team.

[+] go to a university that i want to go to, not one that my parents want me to go to.

[+] finish my law assignments ON TIME. =]

i shall cross them out as i break them, keke.

happy new year everyone... school starts in two days. fighting! o-(^.^o-)

edit: merry xmas!

yaaaay, of all people, my dad wakes us up at 6:30 to open presents and once we're done he goes back to sleep. im the type of person who can't go back to sleep once im up...  thanks dad.

anyways... i got some nice presents this year =) like a burberry tanktop! and a cd that turned out to have all the wrong songs on it ROFL (ive been wanting a michael wong cd forever but sold out everywhere, finally my mom gets one and its like not even him =\ weird)... a professional hairdryer cos my mom's friend is a hairstyling teacher and could order for her... and dyberg/kern earrings...and a new sweater =)  yay.

i hope you all have a very nice christmas and a good new year. <3 going away to whistler for 2 days =) the snow is apparently really good so im exciteeedd.... take care you guys <3

--

presents! <3

whee. yesterday was fun =) went to school at 8:15 to set up for choir cos mr. dewreede told us to, but he didn't show up until like... 8:45 lol cos he was writing music all night for the choir singalong. procrastination hurts, hehe.

anyways we skipped square dancing and exchanged presents instead =) kanghee got me a really nice ring. pink sapphire + sterling silver with white gold. i'll post up pictures when i take them =) so pretty -- thank you <3

then we went to metro... and i got a new cell phone, LG White Chocolate, yay! =) i was gonna get a sony ericsson k510 for like only like 100 bucks but since eBay hates me i wound up buying the phone from some guy on craigslist. at least it was kinda cheap, i rofled when i went into the fido stores and places and they were selling it for like intense money. and its cute and takes photos and plays mp3s and stuff.  <3

and then after a while we went to cho sun for dinner... korean bbq place thats really really really good. and we walked around and it was cold... =) went back to metro and played with my cellphone and played a few games upstairs.

and then we went home. what a long day... =) it was good though.

enjoy your christmasses.... <33

--

you're not alone, togther we stand
i'll be by your side, you know i'll take your hand
when it gets cold, and it feels like the end
theres no place to go you know i wont give in
no i won't give in...

keep holding on
'cause you know we'll make it through (make it through)
just stay strong, cause you know i'm here for you, i'm here for you
theres nothing you can say, nothing you can do
theres no other way when it comes to the truth
so keep holding on cause you know we'll make it through (make it through)

so far away i wish you were here
before it's too late this could all disapear
before the doors close, this comes to an end
but with you by my side i will fight and defend
i'll fight and defend yeah, yeah...

keep holding on, 'cause you know we'll make it through (make it through)
just stay strong cause you know i'm here for you, i'm here for you
theres nothing you can say, nothing you can do
theres no other way when it comes to the truth
so keep holding on cause you know we'll make it through (make it through)

hear me when i say, when i say
i believe nothings gonna change, nothings gonna change destiny
what ever is ment to be will work out perfectly yeah yeah yeah yeah
lalalalalalala...

keep holding on
'cause you know we'll make it through (make it through)
just stay strong cause you know i'm here for you (here for you)
theres nothing you can say, nothing you can do
theres no other way when it comes to the truth
so keep holding on cause you know we'll make it through (make it through)

keep holding on 'cause you know we'll make it through (make it through)
just stay strong cause you know i'm here for you (here for you)
theres nothing you can say, nothing you can do
theres no other way when it comes to the truth
so keep holding on cause you know we'll make it through
we'll make it through...

CHEER UP EMO KID <3

wah, so freaking depressed last couple days. everything’s just been stressful &&overwhelming. so now its time for apologies and explanations...

[+] first of all, I’M SORRY if i offended anybody with the tutors post. those days, day after day, i kept hearing about people with tutors, people kept bugging me about sat’s, and everything just culminated into a big huge mess i guess. apologies, especially to *Catherine... more stuff to say but i won’t say it on xanga because that’s just kinda silly (and wussy).

[+] the whole kwantlen science challenge is a mess too. five groups wanted to go, so mr. tang gave us this like worksheet thing to see who’d get the most right... three groups got 9/10 so he chose us girls (euphem, poo, jennifer, kathy, me) because “the other groups weren’t all there, the wrong people worked together, etc…” i used to be happy but now it doesn’t feel right anymore. cos mr. tang made us do another challenge where we built paper bridges, we got the impression that whoever made the longest bridge won. the first day we met to prep, we couldn’t make anything that held the 1kg mass in the middle without touching the 3” barrier in the middle... and the second day i guess kanghee felt bad for me cos i was working by myself and i couldn’t get anything so he told me how to do part of it... and in the end even though the boys built the longer bridge mr. tang chose our group. and now it sucks because either way i wind up hurting somebody... if i don’t go, it’ll be like going against my friends but then if i do go, it just shows the other team that i don’t care, about equality, or being fair, or just even standing up for whats right. Ram, Ross, Mulin, and Kanghee, i’m sorry that things turned out the way they did. if i had a choice, i would go back and not even apply to go to the damned thing. you guys all deserve to go...

[+] yay. and finally, the biggest cause of any and all stress... i have to write like 10 essays (no joke) for my university applications in about 3 weeks. fuck doesn’t even begin to describe it... and what’s worse my parents are on my case about it twenty-four-seven. like its the only thing they’ll talk about. seriously. i bet if i get in a bus accident the first thing they’ll ask is are her essays ok? are her essays hurt? goddamn those stupid essays. >=( lol. oh well. if you run into me in the hall looking disgruntled, its prolly them essays, again.

[+] fucking law online! i’m getting owned, i've handed in one assignment and you’re supposed to have done four by now. What a joke. i'm so screwed for university because i can’t prioritize and work unless there’s some teacher forcing you to do it T_T

[+] uhill dance December 4^th! come attend. not a source of stress but thought i'd let you know.

wow long post. but now that its out i feel a little bit better. im okay, i always am. sometimes i just wander off the path a bit. if i were Christian, this would be about the time to see only one set of footprints in the sand... (beautiful poem, will post next time) but im not gonna post until i've finished those damn essays... it’ll be this month’s goal (how sad, a xanga goal).

and always always always, can’t forget to thank the people that cheered me up and listened to me rant, even if i was being a complete bitch. /hugs.  

(icons taken from www.xanga.com/broke_halo_icons)

nobody knows,
nobody cares
that i die
on the inside.

nobody sees
the lie that is me
as i smile
on the outside.